Home?
by Sawbuck
Summary: Imagine if the trolls from Homestuck had to travel to a new universe where they could reform their species. Imagine if the universe they traveled to was inhabited by nation-people. Yes, my premise is as silly as this. (Includes dead trolls, because there are so many, and I like too many of them to leave out)
1. A Plea

Conversations smatter the wide meeting, but no one makes a move to start anything really on topic, or even try to hush the faint noise. The few nations who aren't involved in hushed, halfhearted chatter have their heads on the table, or else are writing, or doodling, on papers. Surely, they have something that needs addressing, but no one is willing to step up and direct, with Ludwig not being present.

Without warning there's a knock on the door, and a few of the nearby nations jerk up, startled. One or two scramble to their feet but Francis gets to the door first, and opens with little hesitation.

The figure which stands there has only a delicate hand visible, firmly grey and reached out to grasp the doorframe. The two speak in a hushed tone, despite the fact that everyone is straining to try to catch a peek.

Francis makes some gesture, and then the figure follows him into the room, and gasps echo around the room at the sight of the woman. Her hair is perfectly black, with what appears to be horns, about the same color, with a bit more orange at the base, and shape as a pair of bananas, and her skin is a concreteish grey. A golden tiara with a small purple-pink gem rests atop her head. She wears what looks like a vivid blue and green skirt made of two different fabrics, much longer in the back than in the front, as well as a black tubetop with a pisces symbol on the front. Her wrists are adorned with brightly colored thin bracelets, and one thick gold band apiece. It isn't until she removes she vibrant pink goggles from her eyes, letting them rest on the hair above her forehead, that most notice her magenta colored eyes.

She shuffles her feet for a second, before looking up, just a little above their eyes, and says in a voice that seems to be struggling not to waver, "I didn't mean to disturb all of you if you were doing anyfin impoartant, but I have somefin very important that I need," With all eyes focused so intently on her, the woman takes a second, both hands brushing her long snarled mass of hair back, revealing two small fin-looking things growing in place of ears, "M-My people," her hands find stillness at the waist of her pants, "Need a place, now that oar home has been destroyed, and if wouldn't be too much trouble…"

Arthur's voice sounds as she falls silent, "You came to us asking if we could, what? Shelter your fish-people?" This earns him a few scowls from surrounding nations, but he doesn't even flinch.

The woman nods, and then blinks, shaking her head, "Oh, no, we're not all like this. Just the seadwellers," She adds, "And there's only twenty-four of us, so we wouldn't take up much room,"

"Twenty four?" Roderich asks, "You're only taking twenty four of your people with you?"

She shakes her head, "There are only twenty four of us left,"

Silence.

"Madam," Francis suddenly pipes up, "Would you like to wait outside? I believe we'll need a few moments to discuss,"

She nods, and he gives her a smile, offering his arm, and then leads her out of the room.

The arguments start up almost before the door can close, some people are almost instantaneous to claim they need to do anything and everything they can, while others insist they're just smitten, and it's none of their business anyways, but over-all the agreement is, after quite a bit of quarrelling, that they have to do something.

Then there's an almost longer argument about what solution to use. At first it seems simple enough to just build a relatively small area for them to live in, but then they start to bicker over just where that will be exactly, and who will be giving up land for this and they'll have to be sure not to take the land back later _won't they _(and what happens if it starts to form a nation-person?)? Ivan offers to let them stay with him, but that idea is shot down almost instantaneously. It does, however, lead to a different solution entirely…

When they call her back in to tell her they've come to a solution, she smiles, and thanks them profusely. They send her off to bring her people back in two weeks, after asking her how many of her people are seadwellers, and if they need any special taking care of.


	2. The Plot Continues

Ludwig is scrupulous when they confront him.

He asks, repeatedly, if they're certain they all saw the same thing, and that absolutely nothing was being passed , feeling much better than he had been two weeks ago, is eagerly pressing Francis and Antonio for questions, and insists that he has to be there.

After some debate, Ludwig resigns to the fact that he has to go with what's already been decided, and quickly sends everyone who doesn't want to participate home, and then narrows down the rest into twenty four stubborn nations. Actually, twenty two, considering the fact that he had Gilbert are going to be helping as well.

The wait after that for the woman and her people to arrive is both short and arduously long, each second seeming to stretch into an hour, until at last there's a quiet knock at the door.

Ludwig stands from his previously almost slouched position, and walks smoothly to the door, opening it without hesitation and then blinking at the figure he's presented with.

Well.

They really hadn't been making it up then, had they?

She smiles at him, and without a word leads a group of equally stone-colored individuals, all with dark black hair and yellow-orange horns of some shape. The majority of them wear dark clothing, and some are already talking with one another as they enter (Or signing, as the case may be).

Ludwig coughs, not realizing that his stance, arms crossed in front of him and legs straight and firm, as well as his unintentional scowl could be intimidating. As it is, most of the chatter dies down quickly, and he nods. "So this is all of you then?"

He's given nods, and continues, "We've decided, well, what's been decided is that we're going to allow you to stay with us," he gestures to the small group behind him, "However we… live quite separately, for the main part…"

He's tripping over how to word this without sounding silly, and then suddenly Gilbert does it for him. "Basically, we're gonna split you all up so we can keep an eye on you," He calls out, "Hope you're okay with that,"

The response is a somewhat bewildered stare before protests start up, everyone's shouting out at once about how horrible an idea that is, until one of them, a shorter man with a short mop of hair and tiny little horns, starts shouting on top of them all furiously, face turning red (like his eyes), and everyone falls silent.

"So," He turns his glare to Ludwig, "How are you planning to do this, just walk up to one of us all 'Hey little wriggler-fare you're my slave now'?"

Ludwig blinks, caught a little off guard, and coughs before he replies, "Well, I was only told about all of this a few hours ago so I hadn't had the time to come up with a workable system…"

Suddenly a tall, lanky individual raises a faintly green-stained hand, and seems to be bouncing up and down on his toes with a couple of 'oohs', much to the chagrin of the shorter individual.

After a substantial pause, he growls, "Yes Gamzee?" in an exasperated tone.

Gamzee speaks in a slow, unconcerned tone, though his voice is almost unpleasantly scratchy, "Why don't we just all up and be each other 's moth-" He's elbowed by the one next to him, who coughs, and then he continues to speak, "Why don't we all just be friends and split up that way?"

This idea is met with vague agreement and after a bit of awkwardness, Feliciano, ever the social butterfly, bursts forward and starts talking with an oddly pale woman much taller than him, and with that the two groups dissolve.


	3. Bees and Birds

Gilbert decides to follow Antonio and Francis at first, but then Antonio gets pulled into a conversation with a scrawny little guy with big bull horns, and Francis goes off to start impressing a short woman in a tight blue dress, and Gilbert is left alone.

After a moment he decides to go visit the bathroom, and just as he turns to go he bumps into someone. Or, more accurately, someone runs into him.

They go crashing to the floor, and Gilbert finds himself stuck under a man in a big black and yellow striped suit. His head is concealed in a big yellow helmet, but locks of thick black hair spill out around his eyes. Four yellow spikes emerge from the top of it, oddly resembling carrots.

"Oh wow I'm so sorry," He spits out, rolling over onto his front and then just lying there, "Totally didn't see you,"

Gilbert decides not to move, "Ah, it's okay really,"

The suited individual nods,"I'm Mituna, by the way,"

A grunt, "I'm Gilbert,"

Mituna opens his mouth to say something else, but ends up just smiling as a woman in a blue suit, matching his own, with a Libra symbol across her chest and bright red boots, comes bounding over to them, holding a bright red skateboard.

"Tula!" He giggles, and she sighs, crouching by him. "You okay 'Tuna?"

Tula asks, her skateboard falling to the side, on top if Gilbert, as she drops it and removes Mituna's helmet,"You didn't bump your head again, right?"

Mituna nods eagerly, "Did you see the flip I did?"

She chuckles, mussing with Mituna's hair with one hand, "Totally sweet!"

Mituna turns to look at Gilbert, "This is my Matesprit, Latula,"

Gilbert nods as if he understands as Latula apologizes and kicks the skateboard away, and then he blinks, "Wait, what's a Matesprit?"

Latula shrugs, "You know, the troll you feel flushed for. Or, whatever you creatures are,"

Gilbert, still not really understanding, just shrugs it off, "Anyway, it's nice to meet you Latula. I'm Gilbert,"

Latula nods, and then stands, pulling Mituna up with her, "You too! We gotta be goin, though, we only got so much time left together, y'know?"

Gilbert nods, "Sorry bout that,"


	4. Dogs and Docks

Ludwig is first to seek out the woman he saw earlier; she's obviously their leader, and he wants to know more about them. Specifically, he wants to know what they're running from.

He bumps into the other pink woman first.

She's wearing a loose black t-shirt, neck wide enough to show her thin neon pink bra straps on her shoulders, short enough to leave a considerable gap between its bottom and the top of her black baggy pants. Her hair is kept neat in two very long braids, the ends of which rest on the floor by her feet.

He apologizes immediately, and she snorts but before she can say anything he asks where the 'woman from before' is, giving a brief description since he doesn't know her name.

"Why d'you need her?" She snorts, "She gonna be your gillfrond or somefin?"

Ludwig blinks, her accent too thick for a moment, and then he shakes his head, "I just, I was hoping to talk to her, get some information as to why you're here, and as she seems to be your leader, I-"

The look of shock and sudden fury that the woman gives him at that is enough to silence him all on it's own. Slowly, she opens her mouth, "What'd she tell you to make her think that she wash the only one in charge? _I'm_ the one who's oar queen!"

Ludwig blinks, "Queen?"

She gives a shrug, "The oarfficial tidal is 'Condesce', but yeah," Then she raises one eyebrow, "Boat why did you think she wash oar leader?"

Ludwig gives both a sigh and a shrug, "I wasn't really here when she came before, so I had to go on the word of everyone else, so that might've been it. Of course, it might have also been the fact that she came to ask for our assistance on her own,"

The woman gives a shrug, "Yeah, whale, I woulda come too, boat bassically she said I wash too straightforward for the porpoise,"

Ludwig gives a nod, "I see. Well, I should be… looking around, meeting people. My name is Ludwig, by the way,"

She gives a nod, "Yeah, sure, mine's Meenah. Nice ta meet ya,"


	5. Leavve Me Alone

"Mm hm," Antonio gives a nod, listening as the eager boy in front of him regales him with stories about what their old home was like, not necessarily understanding all the details, but he thinks he has the basics of it.

The boy is scawny, short, and has his hair cut in a loose fauxhawk, though that almost seems more like either a decision he regretted quickly or something, or else the style means something entirely different where he's from, and has these enormously wide horns, shaped like that of a bull, very thick by his head, and wide enough to make Antonio wonder if he has any difficulty getting through doors. He also has what he confirms are entirely robotic legs.

"And, uhm, well, you probably don't have Fiduspawn here, do you?" His voice is pitchy, probably still going through puberty (If they even have something like that), and Antonio gives a shake of his head.

"I'm afraid not," Antonio shakes his head, "What is that?"

Enthusiastically, the boy, named Tavros as Antonio recalls, explains that Fiduspawn is a game where you essentially breed creatures and have them kill each other (Of course, Tavros always just stops and plays with the animals at this point).

Giving a nod, Antonio mentions something about how it reminds him of old matador fights, which leads him down a trail of thought he has to literally shake himself out of.

Once he's taken a moment to shake himself out of it, he gives a nod to Tavros, mentioning something about how he should really go meet his friend Gilbert, thinking they'd get along well.

With a nod, Tavros is gone.

After that, Antonio wanders around a little bit, talking with this or that person (or troll, as he finds out they're called), but not really settling into a conversation that much, and after about an hour he finds that there's really not much of anyone else to talk to.

Aside from the lanky figure slouched at the window.

He only really catches Antonio's eye because he's somehow climbed up to slouch in the windowsill, which is about six feet from the ground, and as Antonio walks by he drops something, muttering something else under his breath, probably some curse.

Giving an almost smile, Antonio bends down to see if he can find whatever was dropped, finding a long white stick.

The boy's gotten to his knees by the time Antonio stands back up, so he holds it up, "You dropped this?"

A grunt, and then he slumps back down, outlined perfectly by the evening sunlight, "Yeah," After a moment he adds, "Thanks,"

Giving a shrug, Antonio gets up on his toes so he can see better, "My name's Antonio, by the way,"

The boy only gives a raised eyebrow at that, "That's nice I suppose," With that he turns back towards the window, seeming to be trying to get him to figure out that he wants to be left alone.

For a moment Antonio is content to leave him to that, but then he takes a second and thinks, and then with a sharp "Oh," he turns back around, intent on talking. "So, what's your name?" Antonio smiles, wishing it wasn't quite so high up, and he didn't have to strain his neck so much.

"W-Why do you care?" The boy scowls, only solidifying Antonio's determination. Antonio only looks at him, so eventually he murmurs, "Eridan Ampora,"

Giving a nod, Antonio fumbles for words for a second, before deciding to ask, "So… what is it?"

A snort, "W-what is w-what?"

Antonio points, "The stick-thing,"

"This," Eridan says, with great importance, "Is a science w-wand. Not a stick-thing,"

Antonio gives a nod, adjusting his footing, "You're stuttering,"

Eridan doesn't seem to hear, so Antonio says it again, and then he gives a sigh, replying irritatedly, "It's not a stutter, it's an accent,"

With a "Hm," Antonio tilts his head to the side, "No one else I've met has an accent," Eridan gives a shrug, "Yeah, wwell I'm not just some other landdwwellin' lowwblood, am I?"

He gives a gesture to his ears, and Antonio gives an "Ohh…" as he realizes that Eridan has the same fin-ears as the woman from earlier. He then gives a nod, "I understand. I have an accent too, unless I really focus on it, and it gives me this horrible lisp," He gives a chuckle, and doesn't seem to notice the _look_ Eridan gives,

"So you're one of the sea-people, then, huh?" Eridan gives an exasperated sigh.


	6. Kitties Don't Run

Ivan is a bit uneasy, approaching all these (Strikingly young, too young to be the last of their kind) people so impromptu, and left to his own motivation, he finds himself just awkwardly shadowing Katyushka, until she turns away from her conversation with the probably-nice woman, who has these weird swirls going down her arms (Though she speaks too quietly for him to hear), to tell him that, really, it's not that hard to just go and say, at the least, hi, and he's a grown nation, he shouldn't be shadowing his sister like this. Of course, she does it with this little smile on her face and Ivan knows she doesn't mean to be mean, so he gives a mute nod and walks off.

He's halfthinking about going to look at the window and picking someone at random when the time arrives, when he walks into someone.

With an, "Oh," he quickly apologizes, looking down to find himself standing before a short woman in an oversized pea-green jacket. She wears a furry vivid blue cat hat, and when Ivan takes a second to look, he realizes that the wide cones coming out of either side in place of ears are in fact her horns.

"Sorry, I didn't see you there," She has a voice that is high-pitched and would be annoying, but isn't somehow.

Ivan shakes his head, "No, it's fine, I was just… going to look at the window anyway, and," He trails off, shaking his head, "I-I'll leave you alone now,"

He starts to walk off, but before he can get more than a step away, she's grabbing at his sleeve, "No wait, I-" She cuts off.

Ivan gives a nod, "My name is Ivan, by the way,"

She grins, "I'm Nepeta. So…" She gestures around her, "Who are all of you? Who's got quadrants where?"

Ivan only blinks at her, "Qu-Quadrants? I don't understand…"

She gives a sigh, as if she's had to explain this before, and leads him over to some chairs where they can sit down. She then finds a mainly blank paper and some markers, and starts to explain.

"In Trollian society," She begins, "Our romance opurrates on a fur-purrt quadranted system." With this she takes a black marker and draws a large plus sign, "More or less, these quadrants are used to define our relationships, which help keep society in order,"

Nepeta looks up at Ivan, and he gives a nod so that she knows he understands.

"The furst quadrant, and the one you'll purrobably understand the easiest, is red romance. Red romance, or Matespurritship is similar to human romance, and is also known as being flushed," With this she draws a red heart in one of the spaces at the plus sign, "Got it?"

Ivan nods.

She gives a nod, picking the black marker back up before continuing, "So quadrants on this side of this line are marked by affection," She draws the tip of the cap across one line of the plus, "And quadrants on this side of this line are marked by intimacy," She draws the cap along the other line. Ivan gives another nod.

"So, on the ofur side of this line," She taps the first line, "Are quadrants marked by hatred. This one here," She taps an empty space on the other side of the heart, "Is fur black romance, or kismesis. A kismetude is a relationship fur of challenging one anofur and dislike," As she speaks, she draws an upside down heart in black, with a stem at the bottom.

"Oh," Ivan says quietly, "I-I get it,"

She nods, "Good," And then picks up a pink marker, "On the ofur side of this line," She points to the other one, the side of the chart that is so far unmarked, "Are relationships marked by, well, lack of intimacy. This one, fur instance, is the best quadrant, Meowrallegiance. Meowrails are kind of like best furrends, except you have to have feelings jams whenefur you think your meowrail needs it. The job of a meowrail, you see, is to keep your meowrail furom breaking down and killing people. This is really impurrtant fur highbloods, beclaws they have a tendency to go a litter crazy,"

Ivan gives only a nod, slumping down so that his elbows are resting on his forelegs, "A-And the last one?"

Nepeta grins at him, "Well, since a kismesis is purretty similar to rivalry, which is something that happens a lot in our society, the furth quadrant, the ashen or grey romance, was created to purrevent trolls furom acquiring any unpawnted extra kismesi. Also known as a Pawspistice, grey romance is the only one that involves three trolls, the third acting as a balance between the ofur two's black feelings. You can have as many Pawspistices as you want, but they're really hard to manage,"

Ivan gives a last nod, deciding to stand up, "Well, thanks for explaining that,"

"No no," She shakes her head, pulling him back down, "You have to tell me who has quadrants where. If we're gonna be living here, I need to know what to purrt on my new shipping wall,"

Ivan only blinks at her for a moment, before sighing.

"Um… Weell…" He begins, frowning almost, "I don't really… The others don't really let me in on a lot of stuff. So, I-I don't… really know all that much about who likes who anymore," Then he adds, perking up a little, "Though, I'm pretty sure if you ask Feliciano, he'll know, more or less,"

She gives a nod, and with that she turns back, looking around the room, searching faces.

Ivan gives a quiet chuckle, "Feliciano is _that_ one," He points towards the Italian, making sure she can see, and she gives another nod, murmuring a "Thanks!" as she bounds off.

Smiling, Ivan turns back to go… do something, when he finds himself walking straight into someone else. Someone significantly taller, more muscular, and scowling.

Though he's a few inches taller than the individual, Ivan finds himself quickly growing nervous, so he breaks into a fresh smile, one that people always seem to find offsetting, and asks what's the matter.

He's responded with a snarl, "What did you do to her?"

The muscular troll before Ivan is sweating, heavily, and has greasy black hair that hangs down to his shoulders. His eyes are hidden behind cracked sunglasses, and as he scowls, Ivan realizes he's missing several teeth. One of his horns is capped in a point, resembling an arrow, and the other ends in a jagged, abrupt crack, like it was broken off.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Ivan replies carefully.

"Nepeta," His voice is a threatening whisper, "You were just talking with her,"

Ivan gives a slight nod, "I-I didn't…. I haven't done anything," With that he gives another, firmer, nod.

This does nothing to convince the irate troll, and he continues to glare until Ivan adds, sheepishly, "She was telling me about your, uh, r-romance… systems,"

At that, a smile cracks across his thin face, and the troll gives a nod, "I see. I apologize for being… , earlier, I just worry." He adds with a slight, barely noticeable snort, "She is my Moirail, after all,"

Ivan gives a light chuckle, another nod, and then decides he'll go visit the bathroom.


End file.
